Have you ever been in one of those situations where trying not to say a particular thing made it almost impossible to carry on a normal conversation? Whether it was a secret to be kept or a distracting physical feature on the person you are talking to, or any other number of things, it gets to the point where you can't think of anything else to say except for that one thing you are trying not to.
I think that is partly what has become of my blog. (in addition to trying to re-enter "normal life" and adjust to one of the biggest changes we'll ever face).
There are 2 subjects that currently occupy much of my waking hours, and, until now, I have opted not to blog about them. Which has turned out to make it hard to think of anything else to blog about! Which seems to almost defeat the purpose of having a blog. Isn't part of the idea of blogging to be able to put in writing some of the thoughts in your head?
So, with hopes of freeing up some space in my mind, I'm going to attempt to spill at least some of those 2 major thought balloons here.
#1 - Alan. Transplant.
We are currently going to Children's twice a week. This is an all-day affair.
Every time we must decide who will accompany me & Alan (usually my Dad or Greg), where Dale will stay.
We pack a bag, in case Alan is admitted.
It seems to simple to put it down in writing, but there is so much that occupies my mind regarding Alan.
I guess that is to be expected. We are so close to it all that sometimes we forget what a BIG DEAL transplant is. Not that we take it for granted. But I think I often underestimate the huge impact we should expect it to have on every area of our life. At least for now. Surely, surely, we will adjust.
And I will go on to say that I don't feel it is necessarily stress about Alan. I say that I trust God with him, and I do. There is just so much to think about, keep up with, plan, process & absorb. And I most of the time choose not to blog about all that. There are lots of reasons why, but that would make this post too long. On to the other thing that takes up a LOT of my thinking:
#2 - Dale. More specifically, school for Dale. Even more specifically, homeschool.
See, a couple of years ago, if I thought about homeschooling my kids (which, Dale was the only one then) I thought it would be so much fun, and I would be good at the organizing and planning and teaching, BUT... it just wasn't for us. I was opposed to the idea in general for our family. Again, this blog post isn't the place for all the reasons & explanations.
But Greg, well, Greg grew to like the idea more and more, and after a while, I did too. I saw that it was the best thing for our family. (Hmmm.... God speaking, perhaps?) And once I switched over to his way of thinking, I have continued to see over and over again how it is absolutely the best thing for us.
And I am so excited. And I have so many ideas. And thoughts. And plans. And I think about all these things a LOT. And, once again, this was something I have been intentionally not blogging about. And again, reasons and explanations are irrelevant at this point.
So. Having those 2 subjects occupying so much of my thinking and then NOT blogging about them didn't leave much room for blogging. (Add to that the fact that I can't get my camera software to behave, so doing anything with pictures is an absolute pain, and that just reduces blogging further!).
Anyway.... now that I've 'outed' myself on these things, hopefully I can either a)just blog about them already or b) stop thinking about what I'm trying not to say and actually have fun blogging about this, that & the other again.
WHEW. I feel better. ;)