Q1. Was it a surprise? Variations: Were you trying? Was it an accident?
A: Depending on who is asking and the spirit in which they ask, this is either simple curiosity or the Rudest Question Ever. Either way, it's a bit personal, don'tcha think? Even my doctor asked this question at my first prenatal visit. He phrased it this way, "Was this God's plan, or your plan?" The answer to that is, "both." No, we were not surprised. And that's all I have to say about that.
Q2. Is this the last one? Variations: Are you done now? Will there be any more?
A: I don't know. We take that one baby at a time (unless in the case of twins, of course). ;) To think too far into the future is overwhelming. But we believe children are a blessing, and, even though we often fall short, it is our goal to take one day at a time. One day at a time is never as overwhelming as years of the big wide unknown spread out ahead of us.
Q3. Are you getting a bigger house?
A: Nope. At least, not that we are planning on. For now we fit comfortably and cozily in this one. We'd like to get rid of a lot of STUFF, and keep the house. But I think we'd do that anyway, new baby or not. And even if we did decide to move to a bigger house, it isn't quite that simple, now is it? Not quite the same as going out for a new pair of shoes.
(Side note: a much more relevant question would be about a bigger vehicle. But for now our soon-to-be family of 7 will all be buckled safely in our same ol' 7 passenger mini-van.)
Q4. What do the boys think?
A: The boys are thrilled. They ask question #2 sometimes, and to them I always answer "It could be. Or there could be more. But this might be all." To which they always respond with something along the lines of, "I hope it's not the last!! I want lots of kids to live in this house!" And by 'them' & 'they' I mean Dale & Alan. They all three adore Brooklyn and love helping take care of her. For this baby they are hoping for a sister for their little sister.
Q5. You must have so much patience.
A: Ummm... no. Child training goes a long way into helping manage any number of kids, but I am no supermom. Far from it. Unfortunately, I have plenty of faults. Want to know (one of) my dirty little secret(s)? Nothing unnerves me more or faster than a crying baby. Really. I can't. take. the crying. Not the best scenario for any mama, much less one that's about to have 3 under 3. This is where you plug in the Bible verses about "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Phil 4:13) and "when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Corinthians 12:10), and abiding in Christ to allow the Spirit to bring forth fruits like gentleness and patience. Those, along with lots and lots of prayer, will answer almost all our parenting faults and weaknesses. But I'm not gonna preach it, because I'm still learning. I've got the concept much better than the execution. :)
Q: A Bonus, since #5 wasn't technically a question: Are you Catholic?
A: I laughed as soon as I was asked this, not because there is anything hilarious about Catholics or their family size, but because I have heard many moms-of-many bloggers say they have been asked this. And there it was. "Are you Catholic?" I suppose I have now 'arrived' on the large family scene.
And no, we aren't Catholic (or Mormon). ;)
Well, I know you already know this, but I just like to say it: I'd give almost anything to hold my Baby #5 in my arms. When I was pregnant, I worried about what people would say (that's one reason why we didn't announce we were expecting). Now that he's in Heaven, I'm not worried any more. He would have been worth any number of comments, as will any future babies (and oh, I hope there is at least one!).
ReplyDeleteSorry for the comment hijack. I want you to know that I am praying for you, friend. And I can't wait to "meet" your new little Buffalo or Butterfly! :)
Are you Catholic?! Ha! Ha! I'm pregnant with #4 and I get Are you crazy? Yep, we are and we love it that way! =) Hope you're having a great pregnancy!
ReplyDeleteKaren your comment brought tears to my eyes and as I was reading it to my husband I choked up and had to wait a bit before continuing to read. May God bless you and your family.
ReplyDeleteTiff your comment brought a smile to my face you seem to be a good sport to not let the comments faze you. I wish Gods blessings on the new No. 4 and the rest of your family. I am Amy's Nana.
Now we are all crying! Betsy, your sweet comments to Karen and Tiff touched me immensely. So well said to those sweet ladies. I echo it, Karen and Tiff. May the Lord bless your now and future pregnancies!
ReplyDeleteI am Amy's mama, and Betsy is mine! :) I love you both!
I'm all smiles to have such sweet blog friends and belong to a couple of amazing women.
ReplyDeleteKaren, I wish we could be experiencing baby #5 "together". Thank you for your honest encouragement.
Tif, congrats to you, too! I'll be following along for sure. And yes, I'm sure a few people think we are crazy. Maybe they're right, ha! :)
Well, you got me too.
ReplyDeleteAmy's sister here.
Love you guys!
I'm thankful that our babies are always our babies, whether in the womb or in arms or in heaven; God created each one unique and wonderful. I can't wait to meet the wee one we lost last year, too.
ReplyDeleteI'm praising God these days for our newest (arrived 3 days ago).
You're doing well with the questions, friend! My favorite is always, "don't you know what causes that?"
Um...yes...and we LIKE it! (hee hee) That always throws 'em!
May you have wisdom and grace in knowing how to answer each person. You never know how your response will challenge their assumptions and make way for change in their own lives.
Can't wait to see your big white 15 passenger van someday (hee hee)
xo
Yes I needed to read this it's weird how I even came across this It was meant to be :) I'm 27 and pregnant with blessing #5 thank you for this it means a lot !
ReplyDelete